2 Weeks

Yummy Boy. Love those dark eyes!

I feel like 2 weeks is the answer to everything lately. We wait 2 weeks to try CPAP again. We wait 2 weeks for the ENT to come. We wait 2 weeks to see if his eyes are improving. We wait 2 weeks to have a care counsel with the Doctors. Ahhhh I am going to go crazy waiting. I guess by now I should be used to waiting, but I am not. So the plan going forward for now anyways is that we will try to ext abate two weeks from our last try (March 3rd) at that point they will have an ENT come in with a fiber optic camera and look down Carter's airway and into his lungs while he is on CPAP to see what is going on for sure. The Doctors and ENT met last Friday to get on the same page. They are both pretty sure that there isn't any sort of mass or anything that would be the problem. Part of me was hoping that there was just so we could have something to blame it on. I soon realized that was pretty ridiculous. For 48 hours before we attempt to remove him off the ventilator they will give him a pretty heavy dose of steroids to hopefully help his little airway. If this attempt fails again they will give him another 2 weeks to try again. When he gets to 40-42 weeks gestational is when we will decide if we need to do trachea surgery. If he is getting stronger and better then they will hold off. If there hasn't been any or much improvement then we will have to get a trachea. We are very anxious to see what the ENT has to say and if the steroids help him. It will be nothing short of a miracle if his airway gets strong enough to breath on his own. Not much has changed other than that. We are just waiting on time as time is the only thing that will heal his airway. Wish we had more time.

5 pounds 15.7 ounces going straight to the cheeks. Brought home the Preemie clothes and brought in the New Born. We have now gone up two sizes in diapers, one size in clothes, and one size up on the pacifier.

Carter doing his pilates with the therapist. Another reason we need him off the vent. Developmentally it is not good for him to be on his back this long and with the vent it is too dangerous to move him around too much.

If you didn't pick up we are sure that we will not be home on or around our due date. This new news has turned this into a 6 month gig. Hopefully not longer. Definitely not the 4 months we prepared ourselves for

Not sure what to think or how to feel

When Carter was first born I met a mom of another 25 weeker. They had been there for six months and her son had just gotten a trachea put in his neck to open his airway. She told me how he would have to have it for two years. During those two years he would not be able to leave the house. If he had doctors appointments or anything he would have to go by way of an ambulance. They would have an in home nurse 24 hours a day. I could think of nothing worse than that.

Well today was take three to get Carter off the vent and after about twenty minutes and adjusting the settings to keep his airway open he failed. The doctor didn't even want to try to make him work for it because it was strictly his airway. His lungs are perfect his airway flap is just not strong enough to stay open.

There are two words that I hate right now time and trachea and they both got put in our vocabulary today. It will take time for them to heal and get stronger or it will take time for us to see if he is a candidate for a trachea. Rough day. We Travis and I included need your prayers.


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He loves Him

Every time we go to the Hospital Boston always asks what we are going to do. I was telling him the other day that I was going to go change Carter's poopy diaper, take his temperature, change his clothes, give him hugs and kisses, and read him a book. Boston told me that he wanted to read Carter a book so we decided to make a movie of him reading to show Carter. Here he is reading Pigeon wants a puppy by Mo Willems and he couldn't have performed better. Enjoy...

I must add that Carter LOVES it! Every time we play it he sats better and and tries to find out where the voice is coming from. Cutest thing ever!!!

Boston really does love his little brother so much. I always worry about how confusing it all is to him. I think I underestimate how much he really gets whats going on. We have found him praying for Carter in the shower, car, in the middle of playing, and always at dinner and bedtime. They are simple prayers, but mean so much. He always talks about Carter and things he is going to do with him. I do think that he is expecting him to come running out of the Hospital and be able to play with him. He loves to look at pictures and watch movies of him. CAN'T WAIT to see the two of them together. Patience.

Two Months

I can't believe it has already been another month. Where do I even begin? I guess a catch up is probably a good start. Carter is doing great! Last Friday they tried to ext abate him again and he was not having it. He only lasted an hour and a half. Trav and I were pretty bummed. It didn't last long though, because then we start talking about all the amazing things Carter has overcome and we know he will eventually overcome the dang vent. One of the Doctors told us that they don't start to worry about the babies being on the ventilator until 36 weeks. Well today Carter is 34 weeks and they aren't going to try to ext abate him until next week around 35 weeks, which means he really needs to last next time. His vent settings are really low. So low that they can't bring them down much further, which is great and frustrating at the same time. We don't understand how they can be so low and him not do well on cpap. Please pray for the little man that he will be able to to last on cpap we really need to get past this stage. Every time he fails cpap we push his coming home time back so we are very anxious. Put the ventilator aside and he is rocking it! He loves his food and tolerates it so well. They are giving him 42cc's over 90 minutes. Sometimes I wonder how he will be able to take a bottle in a short amount of time.

(crazy nurse Ann posing him with all his stuffed animals. If there has ever been a picture with him next to that pooh bear Ann was sure to be the nurse he had that day. She LOVES that thing)

He is also becoming quite the chunk. Seriously he weighs 5 pounds 3.3 ounces. Everyday we go in and see his new weight we are shocked. He is seriously packing on the weight. He is becoming so much more alert and I love it! His dark eye's get me every time. A little while ago whenever I would go in there and look at him I would see a splitting image of Travis. I started to doubt that I had anything to do with the making of him until I remembered I was actually pregnant. Recently though I am starting think he looks so much like Boston. The nurses keep telling me also that they think he looks like Boston. His eyes look like they are turning blue and he has the same cute nose as Boston. I am not totally convinced that he will ever have blonde hair, but who knows. We are so proud of him. Not an hour goes by that we don't thank our Heavenly Father for him and the blessing that he has been in our lives.

To celebrate almost two months Daddy finally got to hold Carter. Trav was way too nervous to hold him when he was so so tiny and then everything happened with his crib mate getting RSV and then he got staf and nurses thought it was best I hold him to help get the antibodies in the milk to help him fight infection. Trav was ready and let me tell you it was one of the happiest moments we have had in a long time. Trav couldn't control his grin and I was in Mommy heaven. Carter I am pretty sure was loving it the most. He was wide eyed and zoomed right into Trav's eyes. Cutest thing EVER!!!

Carter you are such a fighter! Stay strong little man you will be home before we know it.

Snow

Holy cow!!! We have had so much snow lately it is crazy. It's always fun the first day, but by the second I am over it. This time was pretty crazy because we had an ice storm to go with it. Everything froze. We had soda on our back porch and they would blow up and sound like a bomb went off. The worst part about the snow was that the roads were absolutely terrible the first day that I couldn't go see my baby. Maybe that had something to do with me wanting it gone by day two. The best part about it though was playing with Boston in it. He absolutely LOVED it. Aunt Tara was here so she dug right in with us and put her Arizona bones in the literally freezing snow.

(That is a couple inches of pure ice Trav is shoveling there. It was crazy!)

Visitors/Life Savers

I haven't been blogging about anything really besides the little man. We have had quite a few visitors while all this craziness has been going on and they have been absolute life saver.

First off Mom and Dad Wilson. They came when I was on bed rest, then the beginning of January and are actually here again. It's Heaven I tell ya. Life seems so much easier when they are here. Not to mention we eat awesome meals. I don't cook anymore.


Then Uncle Kels/Magoo and Aunt Brienne came. We had such a fun time. I can't wait for them to come again when life doesn't revolve around our Hospital schedule. They were awesome and didn't seem to mind at all. My Brother even went as far as saying "sickest trip ever" on face book. I know it wasn't that great maybe next time, because Dallas really is awesome.


Then Aunt Tara came. She came childless, but that didn't last long because Boston was attached to her hip the entire time. More on this later because it was a pretty fun weekend.


I can't go without mentioning our other visitor that lives 15 minutes away. My Mom. Seriously she does so much and we could not survive this without her neither could my house.

Thanks everyone for coming to visit it. We appreciate it more than you know. Somehow when these people are at our house the laundry is always done, the house is clean, and Boston is a much happier boy. O how we miss the days when we could keep up on everything on our own. We are so blessed.

I'm What?

When we tell Boston he is now 3 that's what he says. You would think we have changed his name or something. So now if anybody asks how old he is he gives them a blank stare. We had a good day considering we didn't put much thought into our plans until the night before. On the morning of his Birthday Grandma D. surprised him with balloons and donuts for breakfast. If you know Boston you know that donuts are the way to his heart.



After that we played with his new playdough toy and went to target for fun. He had McDonalds for lunch with Grandma while Mom cuised down to the hospital because they were putting Carter in clothes for the first time. Boston decided that he would veto the play place and play the ipad in the waiting room at the hospital.

When Dad got home from work we opened presents. Boston got a lot of sports realted gifts including a basketball hoop from G&G Wilson and a soccer net and ball from Mom and Dad. Grandma D. gifted him his first pet/pets. He got 3 fish and a frog. as of now we only have one fish and the frog still alive. Lets just say Mom is not a fan of pets, but can put up with the fish =) We then headed over to Main Event to go bowling. Who knows why we paid for all three of us to bowl, because Boston took over and bowled for everyone. He LOVED it!




After we came home and had Nachos for dinner, because they are his favorite. When I asked what kind of cake he wanted he said he wanted on with a face, blueberries, a flower, and stars on it. I told him to think about it and get back with me. He finally decided that he wanted a glow draw cake which is his favorite game on the ipad. I let Boston decorate the glow draw part and lets just say it was not the prettiest cake.


Happy Birthday buddy we sure do love you.